THE sitting room of the women's refuge is bright and airy.

This is a sanctuary for the bravest women in the world.

Battered, controlled, emotionally and physically abused, sometimes for years, the victims of domestic violence find a bolthole in the refuge.

They may have only the clothes on their back. They may carry the guilt of uprooting their children and breaking up the family.

But these women have found that ounce of strength and courage they need to break free from their abusers.

The Colchester and Tendring Women's Refuge is a sanctuary where they can, first and foremost, be safe.

From there, they will get the practical and emotional support to try to rebuild their lives.

It can take months and it can be a hilly journey - complex is the word June Freeman uses.

June is a founder member of the refuge which opened in 1977.

Over nearly 40 years she has witnessed and fought for a change in attitude to domestic violence but says there is still a legion of work to be done.

Back in the 1970s, there was a culture of what went on behind closed doors was private - even if it included domestic abuse.

June said: "Before 1975, abused women who left their home were considered to have made themselves intentionally homeless.

"It wasn't until 1995 marital rape became illegal.

"It was a patriarchal society and the attitude was families should be kept together, even if they were broken."

The first refuge opened in Alexandra Road in Colchester and offered eight residential places for women in crisis. It had a budget of £5,000.

"At first, it was thought all you need was motherly women; it was absolutely absurd," said June.

"These women had suffered months if not years of terrible treatment. Of course, listening is important but you also need support from people with highly specialised training."

In 1990, the first refuge was replaced by a new one in the New Town area and in 2005 a new purpose-built residential centre was opened.

There are now a total of 21 residential units for women and children in the area.

June said: "When the women first came to us they had been brutally abused. Once they were here, we discovered all sorts of other abuse - sexual and emotional.

"Now it is all recognised as domestic abuse."

A total of 62 women - and their children - were given residential accommodation by the refuge from 2014-5.

Justine Wilsher, adult services manager for the refuge, said: "We will always open up the doors, day or night.

"They can arrive with just the clothes on their back, no money, no documents, nothing.

"They are extremely emotionally damaged and need support.

"Their self-esteem is at an all time low but they had a sense of relief.

"I think it is the bravest thing any woman can do.

"We work with them to give them practical and emotional support. They go through so many different emotions including the guilt of moving children away from their homes. Sometimes they have left everything behind.

"We try to get children into new schools quickly but it can take time.

"They can stay at the refuge for four months, sometimes six months. Finding them a new home is also difficult, especially with the pressures on housing."

There is no stereotypical abuse victim but data shows the majority are aged between 25 and 35.

There are, however, some which are in their teens and others in their 60s, some of whom have endured domestic violence for decades.

June said women are abused an average of 35 times before they seek help.

Even when that huge step has been taken, women can return to their abusers.

"There is an emotional bond there," she said.

"They have had the most intimate relationship and they want to be loved. They thought they were loved.

"Even when they have been completely humiliated, they take comfort in the fact this man cares for them.

"We have an ideology here about letting the women make their own decisions about what they want to do.

"Sometimes the women chose to go back.

"There was one who had been strangled until she lost consciousness. She still went back but six months later, something snapped and she picked her children up and walked out.

"She could not say what had happened but she had, at that moment, made up her mind."

The refuge also offers an outreach service which last year helped 839 women.

Justine explained: "The service offers practical and emotional support to women. Some of the women may not be ready to move out of the marital home. They might have teenage children and need advice or safety planning.

"They might have already separated from their partner but they need help."

Refuge representatives also go into schools and to the Crucial Crew roadshow to advise youngsters on what constitutes domestic abuse.

Julie Powell, who is the chairwoman of the trustees, said: "It is a question of raising awareness of what is and isn't a healthy relationship, what is an isn't acceptable."

About 100 women in the UK are murdered every year by their partners.

Essex Police had been judged to be inadequate by HM Inspectorate of Constabulary for the way it dealt with vulnerable people - including its approach to domestic violence.

It was this year said to have made "significant improvements" but June said more still needs to be done.

"I have worked with some wonderful policemen but the police service still has a lot to learn and has a huge amount of work to do."

Julie said: "In an ideal world, things would improve and we would be out of a job."

June smiled. She added: "Sadly I don't think that will ever be the case."

To donate to the refuge, click here.